In the last week of the upcoming old year, there always seems to be some stress in my life.
By: Mick Boskamp
This time I got sick 7 days before this New Year's Eve. Flu. I was lucky too. Because I got a cold, cough and fever the day after my friend René van Collem recorded his latest episode of his Podcast series 'Van Verslaving Tot Vrijheid' with me as a guest.
I was already quite nervous to talk for fifty minutes about my addiction and recovery and everything that had to do with it in my life. And I couldn't use a cough, sneezing and a cold voice at all. In retrospect, I had been nervous for nothing. I know the famous drummer and family counselor is a great guy. Otherwise he wouldn't have been one of my four besties. But as an interviewer and moderator, I found him to be a real sensation. What peace, what strong reactions to answers, how relaxed, in short: René knows how to get the best out of people. The best and the most intimate.
One of the comments on YouTube stated that we are very sweet with each other in the Podcast. Well. I have tried to be myself and honest as much as possible. And it would be a nice thing if I could please viewers / listeners, who can't stand emotions, with detachment.
It was very okay that two days after the podcast went online I received a spoken app message from René in which he said that this was by far the broadcast with the most views (towards 1000). He gave some possible reasons for the success (René had just been portrayed on television with his wife by Joris Linssen and the name Playboy in the headline, strangely enough, still works), but all in all, 1000 was a lot. He ended the message with, "And don't get too much ego out of this, eh, Playboy?"
Then when I got on the phone with a dear friend who has been in recovery for almost five years and I told her about René's funny ego comment, she later texted me. In large white letters on a black surface it read: 'Ego is not your Amigo.'
That was the second time I was lucky in the week I was sick. Because I needed that cry exactly at that moment. Coincidence wanted (in other words: my higher power took care of it) that on Saturday December 31 (today) a Playboy New Year's Eve party would take place in Amsterdam Hotel Arena. A party where I would be a kind of guest of honor with many years of service at the magazine. In that capacity I was also allowed to invite a number of guests myself. I decided to only invite people who have had direct contact with Playboy, either as models or photographers, or as authors or editors. And in that feverish brain of mine, all sorts of things suddenly happened. With a boost from the success of the Podcast and being the guest of honor, my ego grew. And with a considerable speed that was caused by the fact that I was also thrown back to a time when ego was all-determining.
Thinking about the words in the app I received, I decided not to be friends with my ego for a while and to change my thoughts to what I want to do in the new year. All things that are good for me. And if possible, especially for my fellow man. And I'll tell you what: then that self-centered ego made it get away as fast as it could. I'm glad I got that insight at the last minute of the new year.
HERE the link to the relevant Podcast. Castle Craig is of course also in it.