Yes, you are going through something as a recovering addict! Just read the new blog of journalist Mick Boskamp, 9 years clean & sober and former client of Castle Craig.
A week ago, at noon. I'm in a cafe-restaurant in the middle of the country and I order a flat white. That's a cappuccino with a double espresso, because I have the disease of more.
The way the coffee is served makes me happy. With a glass on the side full of creamy, delicious-tasting whipped cream.
I've had the last spoonful of whipped cream when my appointment comes in, who looks at the empty glass and asks, "Can you have alcohol?"
'No. Why?', I respond surprised.
"Because you just spooned a cup of coffee," my appointment replies. "There was coffee liqueur in that whipped cream."
The lady who served the coffee hears fragments of our conversation and asks if everything is to your liking. “No,” I say emphatically. "Unbeknownst to me, I just drank whipped cream with alcohol and I'm not allowed to have alcohol."
“But it was a few drops,” the coffee lady says apologetically.
Next I want to tell her the story of the Italian man from Naples who was clean & sober for 15 years and who was given a dessert that contained a small amount of alcohol without being told. Fourteen days later, the Italian man was in a detox clinic recovering from a 2-week alcohol binge. But I just don't have the strength for it. Unfortunately, as many don't understand, she probably doesn't understand the dynamics of addiction after all.
A few days ago, in the morning. I watch Nickelodeon children's television with my girlfriend's son. The presenter is sculpting something and says: 'You almost get addicted to this. Do you know what addiction is? That is when something is really fun, which makes you do it more often.'
Entirely right! Being an addict is a lot of fun!
Just ask the Italian man from Naples, who was clean&sober for 15 years, fell back on a few drops of alcohol and then drank himself almost to death.